Marriage Monday: My Piece of the Pie...or Cake...or Doughnuts

**I wrote this last week looking forward to springing it on you sharing it with you today.**

I woke up this morning and stumbled into the kitchen to the coffee maker. As that wonderful elixir was percolating I started searching for my breakfast. Last night, Hubby had brought home two bags of those little chocolate “wax” Donettes from the store. I call this a “faux food” because I’m not really sure how much of it is synthetic and how much is good old fashion flour, sugar and eggs. And yet…I wanted some. I knew that, as a family, we had been munching on them a bit last night as we were up a little late, but I also knew there was at least one whole bag left on the kitchen counter when I went to bed. (can you see where this is going?)

I searched and searched to find those little waxy wonders and finally struck gold in the LIVING ROOM??! On a side table where dh normally sits there sat the bag…with about half of the contents missing! Now where could they have gone you ask? Ha! After living with this man for so many years I knew exactly where they were and how they got there.

I could go on, but I thought he’d perhaps want to offer his own defense…uh, version…uh…well, here are his thoughts. From his lips to my keyboard.

“As is my usual desire to keep my wife’s figure and health in check (per her wishes) I strive to reduce and eliminate temptations that might overpower her in times of weakness. Please realize this is purely selfless on my part as she has expressed on countless occasions over our 20 years of marriage, her hope to regain/maintain her youthful figure. I feel it is my duty as her provider and protector to shield her from her own self-destructive ways.

With her well being in mind, years ago I implemented a policy in our home that I like to call “Proportionate Portions” and I apply it specifically and religiously to desserts. You see…I myself being 6’2”, with a meaty Schwarzenegger like physique *cough* (with some “bonus” marbling that has been added over the years, *cough* *cough*) feel that a 2/3 for me and 1/3 for her ratio is an appropriate portioning computation. Of course my bride hasn’t always agreed with this line of thinking, (she’s never been good with numbers) but I assure her it is for her own good. I have only her best interests in mind when, at 2:30 in the morning, I rouse myself from peaceful slumber, drag myself to the kitchen, rummage through the cabinets, stumble into the living room and begin ridding our home of any pernicious pies, devastating donuts, capillary clogging cupcakes or other evil edibles that might cause her to stumble. It’s a matter of self-sacrifice to me. It’s chivalry reborn. I’m taking one for the team. Why can’t she see this?”


All right readers…care to comment?

FREE Movie Monday from Redbox

We've started having Friday night family movie time on Mondays all because of Redbox. If you haven't tried it, you should. It's easy and very convenient (for those who live near a Redbox location). Even without the free movie code, it's only $1/day to rent movies.

Today's free code for a Redbox movie is 92X7WF.

This code is good for one free movie and you can use it until midnight tonight.

Note:- If you want to rent more than one movie for free, bring more than one credit/debit card. You can use the same promotional code, you just will need different cards to charge it to. The charge will be zero as long as you return your movie on time for the next day.- When entering in your free movie code, you need to enter it FIRST before picking the movie. On the very first screen, click the, "Rent with Promo." Enter in the above code and then make your selection- the amount should then total zero.

What Do Spaghetti and Chest Congestion Have In Common? Oregano!

A good friend, who knew I've spent all winter battling bouts and pockets of flu-like yuckiness, dropped off a little gift for me yesterday. A little baggie (she's BIG on baggies and boxes and all things to compartmentalize our lives...we're alike in this!) with a bottle labeled "Oil of Oregano" and an information sheet with dosages, etc.

Now, I'm Italian you see, and oregano is a seasoning I'm well familiar with and it has, on many occassions played a part in helping me feel preeeety dang good (the smells of my childhood comfort foods are wafting through my memories right now), but never have I heard of it having any true medicinal properties.

As a card-carrying skeptic I would probably have not even tried this except that I was desperate. My throat was closed up, Mucinex wasn't touching my congestion and not even Nyquil nor Montana cough syrup *nod to Gumbo Lily* could help me to sleep comfortably because of a lovely dry, hacking cough that seems to accompany any illness I ever have. (I tell my mother it's because I have "weak lungs" from growing up in a smoker's house. Shame on me for putting that guilt on her...but I do.) So, I thought...what could it hurt to try some of this stuff?

According to the directions, I put about 5 drops in a glass of grape juice and chased that with a big glass of water. The smell alone would have dropped a lesser woman to her knees, I think. Not "bad" but so strong! Like snorting marinara sauce. I also dribbled 2-3 drops on my fingers and rubbed into my neck and chest thinking it might work like Vick's Vaporub to stop my coughs. I was a little worried at first because my skin was tingling and even grew a bit warm and pink. I wondered if it was going to cause a reaction or something on my skin and what it would take to get that thick oil off. But that wasn't necessary as it settled into a nice warm feeling around my neck and chest.

All I can say is that I slept like a baby. Dh told me I barely coughed all night (poor thing is such a light sleeper that if I even so much as sigh he wakes up) which is saying something. In addition I can feel the congestion breaking up all day and was clearing alot of the yuck out of my chest (sorry...I know it's gross, but life's messy).

I decided to do a little MORE research on it to see what others had to say. I ran into the usual wacky claims of it's "miracle" properties, but I also came upon some solid information too. It's a bit pricey, but a little goes a long way. I'm planning to keep this in my medicine cabinet for years to come as it's reported to have antiseptic, antifungal and immune boosting properties and more.

I'm not sure I'll look at oregano the same way again. I'll have to remember to send my friend a special thank you card! (though I hate to admit when she's right...she'll never let me hear the end of it! Do any of you have a friend like that? LOL)

****EDIT March 16th - While the O of O is helping to break up the congestion, I am still very sick. I didn't want to leave this entry sounding like it was a cure-all or over selling it's properties. :-)

Spring Cleaning Inspiration from My Sick Bed

Here's the comment I left for Amy at The Mother Load. Run over there and tell me if you don't feel a bit of that ol' spring cleaning bug biting you as you admire her shiny kitchen.

"Brava! Brava! The flu has me down right now and so I have abandoned the challenge temporarily, but I'm inspired even as I sit here with my fever breaking and can't wait to feel well enough to...clean? Something sounds wrong about that! LOL"

Coughing, Swollen Throat, Aches...'Must Be the Flu.

I thought I skated through the yuckiness that dd had last week, but apparently it was just lying in wait for me. It's got a pretty good grip now so I think I'll be "down" for today at least. Dd swears she'll nurse me and has my comfy blanket and tissues all ready to go on the sofa.

Talk amongst yourselves...

Money Monster

Today I am beginning to rework our family budget. We’ve gotten a little lax over the last few months and have started reverting to our non-budget days where our money happened to US rather than us happening to our money (ala Dave Ramsey). We’re not saving ALL of our receipts. We’re not balancing our checkbook WEEKLY. We’re not spending our money on paper FIRST, etc.

Dh met with one of the Crown Financial Coaches at our church a week and a half ago to get some advice and he suggested we start from square one. We’ve been through the Crown classes years ago and understand the principles, but are convicted that our mechanics are a bit rickety and so we agreed that this was a good idea.

I’m excited and apprehensive all at the same time. One of the reasons we weren’t able to stick with the Crown layout for a length of time is that Dh has a fluctuating income. The way Crown’s spreadsheets, et al for your monthly income, monthly expenses, etc are set up make me crazy when all of these categories are really always in flux. So instead I switched to more of a Dave Ramsey approach (he thinks more like I think…Big Picture). I listed our bills in order of priority down a page and, as money came in, I paid them. If it wasn’t on the list (if I hadn’t spent it on paper first) then I didn’t spend it …unless…it was an unforeseen expenditure, in which case I usually took from our emergency fund…

Aaaah, the emergency fund. Well, THAT is another sore subject. Our emergency fund is all but gone. Due to my laxity in budget keeping and the lack of diligence in my list/budget making each month…well, “unforeseen” things have suddenly started to appear in our lives. They’ve all been necessary, but if I had been watchful, they wouldn’t have snuck up on me. Argh!

And so, it’s back to the budget drawing board for us today. Oh to be a little less creative and a little more analytical. This whole right brain-left brain thing is a crock!

Fueled By Three Cups of Coffee and Two Pamprin...

I started my morning the same way I always do. Stir and roll-over to check the time. 5:00 am. Try to get back to sleep, despite the Call of the Bladder. Finally get up around 5:30 because I just can’t fight that feeling anymore (warning 80's song reference). I’m erect, but I keep my eyes shut as much as possible as I shuffle and feel my way through the familiar dark of my home to the bathroom. If I turn on the light I know I won’t be able to get back to sleep.

I take a minute and trek back to my warm bed and so begins the waiting. Waiting to see if, by some chance I can doze back to sleep for just a little while or, since I usually can't, waiting until there is a more sane number on my digital clock so I can get out of bed and start moving around the house.

In the meantime I lay there, making my day’s to-do list, praying for those who come to my mind, planning dinner, trying to remember where things are and what I needed them for in the first place.

Today my ponderings are accompanied by PMS cramping (oh joy!). What is it about my body that I can’t actually start this monthly ceremony at a decent hour when I’m well prepared, but instead at the pre-crack of dawn when I’ve not had enough sleep to begin with? Such is life.

And so I get up. Go through my bathroom rituals...WITH the light ON this time. Start my fuel pump (coffee maker) and work at getting the child-safety cap off the sample bottle of Pamprin I received in the mail a few days ago (thanks Freebies 4 Mom). I take my recommended dosage of the pills and wash it down with my liquid drug-of-choice which I then carry to my office, fire up my computer and start my day.

The best part of waking up is…

Free Movie Monday from Redbox

We've started having Friday night family movie time on Mondays all because of Redbox. If you haven't tried it, you should. It's easy and very convenient (for those who live near a Redbox location). Even without the free movie code, it's only $1/day to rent movies.

Today's free code for a Redbox movie is PL96QA. (thanks MotherLode)

This code is good for one free movie and you can use it until midnight tonight. Enjoy a free family movie together!

Side Notes:- If you want to rent more than one movie for free, bring more than one credit/debit card. You can use the same promotional code, you just will need different cards to charge it to. The charge will be zero as long as you return your movie on time for the next day.- When entering in your free movie code, you need to enter it FIRST before picking the movie. On the very first screen, click the, "Rent with Promo." Enter in the above code and then make your selection- the amount should then total zero.

Craptastic Cheapsakes!

What goes better with a morning cup of coffee than a clever turn of phrase?

Like this wit-twister I was treated to this morning from a column by Lizz Winstead in the latest issue of Plenty magazine, “ The great family heirloom is quickly being replaced with craptastic cheapsakes.”

http://www.plentymag.com/features/2008/02/life_in_the_green_zone.php

After wiping the laugher-sprayed coffee off the front of my pajamas and the moisture from eyes I realized that Winstead had summed up in two words what I’d been trying to explain for years as to WHY I shop at thrift stores (besides the money savings), WHY I like “ugly old” furniture and knick knacks. And ultimately WHY I quilt and give handmade gifts when I can. Because I don’t think this world or the people I love who live in it, need any more cheaply made, non-durable, non-sentimental things that are soon out-dated and more likely than not out of commission.

Tell me…when was the last time you lovingly ran your hand over the pressed particle wood desk purchased in 1995 from Desks R Us and pondered how its’ future recipients would cherish it and what memories it would hold for them? As a matter of fact…is that desk you bought back in ’95 even still being used…or did it fall apart the last time you moved it from one side of your office to another?

Or linens. Do you suppose our daughters and grand-daughters will pull out our JCPenney pillowcases from the spring 2000 bed-in-a-bag collection and press them with lavender water before tucking them neatly onto the guest bed, thinking all the while about all of the seconds that some underpaid worker in Bangladesh or Malaysia took in pulling them from the assembly line?

How about the latest video game console or iPod? In 25 years will your grandson cling to an Xbox 360 and shed a respect-filled tear over Microsoft’s craftsmanship?

I have to agree with Winstead when she says, “I have the sneaking suspicion that 100 years from now, my great-great-grandchildren won’t be clamoring through my attic saying, “Oh look! It’s one of those vintage Air Poppers. I think I’ll make a lamp out of it!”

Oh, I know it’s very PC to be “green” these days, and that Winstead’s article is more about saving the earth than saving memories, but I’m more accidentally green rather than purposefully so.

When I’m quilting or crafting or buying for my home the heirloom angle is always on my mind. I also think about all the stuff I have sitting around my house that will end up in the landfills without a second glance and believe me, I have plenty of experience with this as I’ve already sent hundreds of “craptastic” items that way.

This ideal has come over me just in the last few years. Now, when I’m shopping I ask myself, “Will my kids want this in 20 years?” and “Will it even be around then?”

I ask myself the same question when I’m quilting. Since I hand quilt almost exclusively, I take special care in the quality of the work I put into it, hoping against hope that the project in my hands will make it beyond the average lifespan of a cheaply manufactured “must-have-today-so-I-can-replace-it-tomorrow” Walmart special. And while my needle glides in and out of the fabric I enjoy imagining that one day one of my descendants will be rummaging through MY attic and find a REAL treasure.

**Addendum: Please realize that while I did enjoy this article by Lizz Winstead I do not endorse her political comedy or views. I just thought her turn of phrase was witty. Don't read too much into it, all righty?**

My Six Word Life Story

Six word memoirs. An interesting concept, I thought as I was scanning the newest Reader's Digest and came upon a feature about a contest Smith Magazine ran last year asking folks to write their life stories in six words.

Then I sat down with a cuppa java and did a little blog-walking this morning and ran upon this writing exercise that Gumbo Lily did with her teenage sons.

A few of my FAVES that I've read so far:

Bad brakes discovered at high speed. —J. Baumeister (been there...yikes!)

Never really finished anything, except cake. —C. Perkins (can I get an "amen"?!)

I still make coffee for two. —Z. Nelson ( and I drink it all! LOL)

God, coffee, family. In that order. ~Mom (somethings are obvious! :-))

And the one I WISH I would have thought of MYSELF....

Asked to quiet down; spoke louder. - Wendy Lee (if you know me....you understand! LOL)

I tried to write my own with a clever twist, but this is what it all boiled down to.

Lived without Jesus, discovered I can't. - Michele

What is YOUR six word memoir??

Maintenance

Please excuse me if you subscribe to my feed and receive re-postings. I am attempting to do a little spring cleaning and am not sure what will come across the feeds to you.

Any comments or suggestions are welcome. Can you read this font size well?

Michele

Bag Lady

I've never made a purse or tote or really anything related to them, but it was my goal this year to try my hand at it and here are the results.

This first little bag I made using instructions from a tutorial I found online at Chocolate on My Cranium. This really helped me understand how to do the lining. Sooooooo, easy with all her great pics.



And it's reversible!



The next is a creation of my own design. It took me a little finagling to figure out the how-to and it's not "perfect", but I like it well enough that I'm counting it a success. I think I'm going to call it my Four Fat Quarters bag.





And...no comments on the dead leaves in the overgrown hedges, all right? If I have to choose between yard work and sewing...my needle and thread win every time!

There Once Was a Man From....Limericks Anyone???

There's a fun little contest going on at Rocks in My Dryer that you might enjoy. Make up a limerick and post it to her blog today and you'll be entered to win a MP3 Player.
Here's my entry:

In the mirror she gazed with despair

O’r the size of her derriere

Not to mention her thigh

How’d it get that size?

And LOOK, she’s got a matched PAIR!

Out of Step

You've heard that quote, "Life is not about fitting in, but about standing out", I'm sure. Well, apparently I've taken that to heart.

Or maybe it's less that I "stand out" and more that I am always running to catch up with those who are "in".

I miss deadlines regularly. I say I'll call and then I forget to do so. I hear about an event or happening a week after it happens. It's not that there's something "wrong" with me, I think, it's just that I'm out of step with everyone else.

I think I'm particularly aware of this today because I MISSED the deadline to get my ds enrolled in our local community college. Now, it's not the end of the world because he's only a sophomore and these would be dual credit classes, but that's not the point. The point is that I INTENDED to do something and I DIDN'T! He's not upset...overly, though he was looking forward to this new adventure and is disappionted. Argh!

I'm assigned to help with my church welcome team. Invariably I check the calendar a week or two AFTER I was scheduled and weeks before I'm scheduled again. Missed it.

I also help with the student ministry as a sort of "presence" since ours is so large. Same thing. I miss my assigned days.

Meetings? Same. I had a teleconference meeting with some folks from our bible quiz group last night...forgot all about it. Missed it.

I do this all the time!

Forgetfullness? Out of Step? I don't know, but I can tell you it's really frustrating...not only to ME, but those around me.

None of us want to be sheep, but just every now and then I'd like to blend in just a bit better than I do currently. I don't want to be "that mom".

A Little Befuddled...

I recognize that at this time of year the expectation is that one will blog about the New Year, resolutions, goals, plans...perhaps stopping briefly to look back at the year that went before and ponder and ruminate upon your own mental "highlight" reel. I do recognize that...but I can't seem to bring myself to do it.

2008 is starting very s l o w l y for me. I can't seem to get my mind or energies wrapped around the whole "new beginning" feeling nor can I muster the enthusiasm or imagination to make goals and resolutions. I'm a GREAT starter...all beginnings thrill me, but...not this time...not yet.

Today, I'm taking down our Christmas tree and rearranging our living room restoring space and, hopefully, order. Perhaps THEN I will feel more like I'm standing on the precipice of a hopeful and happy new year. Currently...I just have a headache. :)